In response to Hot Toddy’s post today, I wanted to share something that I wrote l about my treadmill experience… Is is wrong to recycle Blog entries?

Terror on the treadmill – 12/10/2002

I know it has been a while since I’ve last written and I apologize. I have found a new vigor in life, love and yes, even in work.
I have gotten to a point where life is rolling along again. I’m even better about going to the gym. I feel so good after a nice hard workout. This is actually where I need to begin my story…
I usually wait until after 7:00pm to go to the gym. This allows for the after-work rush to process through and I get the tail end of it. (affording me the benefits of the show without the headaches of waiting for a machine) Last night, I arrived at the gym, bag slung over my shoulder, headphones affixed to the ears, ready to sweat to some Disco. I proceeded to the gym to change into my workout gear and new sneakers.
After changing, I headed to the second floor where the cardio is located, well actually where the bulk of the gym is located. And to my amazing eyes, every single piece of cardio equipment was occupied except … The TREADMILL.
Now I have never been on a treadmill before. I’ve played with one at the stores, but never really used it to exercise. I jumped on the only piece of cardio equipment available and pretended that I knew what I was doing and I had no doubts about how to operate this thing. That was my first mistake. Or no, my first mistake was to do this while the latest dance song was pounding into my headphones. I pushed a few buttons and the damn thing started lurching towards the sky. “Oh!” ,I remarked, “That must be what the incline button does.” I adjusted the incline to feel like I was back home in good ‘ol San Francisco and I was climbing away towards Twin Peaks.
Next came the speed request from the little computer running the show. “hmmmm” how fast do I walk? I’ve never timed myself. Lets say 5mph that seems reasonable enough. The belt started moving and I jumped on and started walking. Or run/walking as the case may be. I adjusted the speed down to 3.5mph which was MUCH more doable for me.
It’s the funniest feeling walking on a treadmill when you are 6’4” tall. I’m used to walking, I’ve been doing it most of my life, but when I was walking on this thing, I felt nauseous. I felt like there was something not right in the world. I had a constant fear the entire time I was on that damn contraption, that I would glance at a hot man walking by, put a foot ever so slightly out of place and have the belt whisk it out from under me taking my body with it sending me careening to the belt whirling beneath me, where I would then be moved at great velocity into the machine directly behind me with a thud so loud the entire gym would gather around at the dork laying mangled in yet another tragic treadmill accident. These things happen. I know they do.
So I walked, holding onto the side rails for life, my gaze fixed squarely on a specific point directly in front of the machine. Concentrating on that spot, I walked, and as I walked, I got more and more comfortable, until I picked up a bit of a jaunt to my step. I was swinging my arms, I was getting into this new machine driven sidewalk. Then the worse thing that could ever happen happened. The machine started beeping at me, telling me that my pre-set time was about to expire. This filled me with dread. I knew the machine would stop, but would I be able to? The machine started to slowdown, eventually coming to a stop. My head was telling me that the machine was still moving, and to keep walking. It was about 5 minutes before I could walk a straight line again without feeling dizzy.
Needless to say, I won’t be running on one of those things anytime soon!