When I was younger, in my early to mid-20’s, I always tended to go against the grain of what was acceptable and what was responsible and it seemed as though I was also much happier in general. (Then again, that could have something to do with the drugs I was constantly on.) I had less “stuff”, less debt, less responsibilities and conversely much more freedom. As I’ve grown older, so has my responsibility levels, ownership of “stuff” and debt load. I freely admit that I have a slight shopping addiction and the after-effects of that addiction do catch up from time to time, but in general, I want less. I want less stuff, less debt and to leave less of a footprint than I currently leave on the planet.

There was a time, when I could move my entire world within a day since 90% of what I owned fit easily inside my Honda CRX. Now, I would need a medium U-haul to move my belongings, which in the grand scheme of things isn’t terribly much stuff to have accumulated. When I moved from San Francisco to Chicago 6 painfully long years ago, all of my worldly possessions took up less than half of a van.

My point in all of this is that there is a trade-off in the works. It seems that each new item I purchase requires an equivalent loss of freedom. I think the reason this is becoming such an issue for me rests on my desire to relocate to a less congested and warmer climate. So I’ve begun paring down my belongings even though there are no definite plans to vacate my current life in Chicago, merely a dream of warmer places, and green hills in the winter.

In other news…

Yesterday, my beloved Blanco Mommy Wagon died on me again and this time required towing. The dashboard lit up like a disco at 3am and the engine died. I’m hoping its something minor like a battery or something. I think it was because I did have every conceivable electrical comfort device turned on. The windshield wipers to remove the snow, the heated seats to warm me bum, the A/C to keep the windows defrosted, the radio, the headlights, the rear window defroster and I think I was charging the Nano while the stereo was blaring out the tunes. TLBO is just mortified that it died in Boystown and keeps muttering things like “aiigh gurl” or “how embarrassing”.

Upon arriving home from that ordeal, I had the below little note left for me in the inbox of one of the online services I use to look at naked men.

“you really should add a section to your profile letting guys know your (sic) a complete fucking asshole to other people given the opportunity. I mean your sooo honest about everything else what could it possibly hurt?

Its so funny. Everytime I see you I think about kicking your ass, but then I remember that there is nothing I could do to you that you will not do to yourself. Poor impulse control.

You did look good in your suit in Starbuck(sic) though.”

I would say that was a good end to a bad day.