wednesday wank

January 29, 2008
tasty

Prawns sauteed in Olive Oil infused with Garlic, Curry and Basil, over brown rice with a Basil flower garnish.
where is the anger? it’s long gone
I used to write a lot about politics, the person illegally sitting in power in the White House and the tragic and, in my view, illegal war he started, but I have not written anything about it in a very long time. (I know, I have not written much about anything in a very long time) Last night’s State of the Union fabrication reminded me of how much hasn’t changed in the positive in this country in 7 years. It also made me realize that I have not written anything politically minded recently.
I used to be angry, very angry, about everything this administration did. I would seethe at the blatant lies they reported, the lack of any accountability and the demise of the true meaning of this experiment in government that is the United States. I grieved for the destruction of the principles of self-government, and for the reputation of our once great nation in the world’s market of public opinion. When, swept away with hatred, fear, ignorance, and blatant election schemes, this country re-elected the same fear-mongers for another 4 years of this ugly nightmare, my anger resurfaced.
But that was 3 long years ago. Three years of more lies, more scandals, more corporate-lacky acts and shenanigans. Three years of the erosion of any stability of the rapidly dwindling middle-class in favor for the growth of the top1%. Three more years of predatory lending and business debacles.
What has this government given the American public?
Massive debt to pay for empire building.
Oil companies quarterly record-breaking profit surges.
Gasoline prices that are sending the economy into a tail spin.
Abu Graib
Katrina
Domestic Spying
Valerie Plame
Guantanimo
Enron
Blackwater
AT&T and the rest of the communication giants reading your e-mail, tapping your phones.
Vote-rigging electronic voting machines
Predatory lending practices
Skyrocketing home foreclosures
I could go on for hours and this list would not be complete. There is so much more that we will never know of in our lifetime, thanks to the signing statements, secrecy and missing destroyed communications.
Given all of this, why am I no longer ranting and angry with these people? Because I am tired. I’m burnt out.
You can only be angry for so long before you resign yourself to inaction and acceptance. The fact that nobody has done anything to hold these people accountable speaks to our place in history. We the people let this happen. We thought we were doing the right thing when we elected in a democratic majority into congress this past session, but they’ve done nothing to hold these people accountable. They’ve rolled over on every single fight and given in without so much as a whimper of protest, all the while shouting to the media about change and a new direction.
This country is no longer about freedom and democracy, if it ever truly was and the sooner that the masses of under-educated, over-worked and over-taxed get that into their heads and stop proclaiming this country is the greatest the better it will be.
I, for one, can no longer drink the Kool-aid of American superiority. Our political system is broken. Multi-national companies and special interest groups control what we eat, what we know, what we do and soon will even control what we have access to on the internet (if they get their way, and it looks like they will.)
So go ahead and debate, Obama vs. Hillary, Mitt vs. McCain. None of it truly matters, because it’s all bullshit. Follow the money always works on Law & Order to catch the real bad guys… as it does in politics.
January 28, 2008
give me space… bar keys

From the San Jose Mercury News Police Blotter
50 Embarcadero Road, 12:17 p.m. Jan. 21
Twenty-eight space bar keys were stolen at Palo Alto High School.
January 27, 2008
Sex… and pizza.
Americans have a fucked up view when it comes to joy and pleasure. We have this duplicitous view that drives us to crave joy and pleasure while at the same time feeling incredible guilt. You know you want that candy bar, but, oh, no, you better not, cause it will be bad for you.
The same can be said of sex. I’ve always been outwardly very sex-positive in my views, if not my actions, yet my inner demons twist these beliefs and views until they are confused and distorted, sort of like looking through a mud smeared window, or trying to watch pay-per-view adult films, without actually paying for them, only seeing the scattered static and rolling picture lines. I often walk away from a sexual encounter unsure of how I feel, having brief moments of guilt and sadness, thinking that I’m destined to be alone, only to realize that the thought is not my own, but one forced upon me by the greater society.
I embrace good sweaty sex. I enjoy exploring another’s hidden points and turn-ons. I believe that the touch of another human being is one of the most important things in life. Touch grounds you, connects you, and feeds your soul. It feels good too. The intimacy of good sex, be it anonymous or in a committed relationship fills the soul with a fuel that is so easily depleted in today’s modern, efficient, yet cold world. I wish, as a culture, we could all embrace a more health-ful view of sex, joy, and pleasure, and remove the guilt, the shame, and judgment so often heaped upon those with different views.
So why is it, that every time, I come home from a good night of hot sweaty sex I crave a pizza? TLBO can tell you stories of the late night Tombstone pizzas™ prepared before I crawl into bed, spent, and completely content. But that is for another day.
January 23, 2008
wednesday wank

January 16, 2008
wednesday wank

January 10, 2008
Date night
I’ve been thinking about dating quite a bit lately. In truth, I’ve been dating a little bit since I arrived in the Bay Area and that old adage is true, “if you don’t use it you lose it.” I may even have a crush or two developing, which is something that I’ve not really allowed myself to experience in many years. Its true and its freaking me out just a little bit. In Chicago, I isolated myself from any possibilities of a lasting relationship because I knew that I wouldn’t be staying around. I kept people at arms length, letting them in just enough to keep them around, but not close enough that they felt comfortable about staying and re-painting my bedroom to cover that nasty blue hue that I chose on a drunken shopping spree at Homo Depot. I always knew that I’d have to repaint that damn room on my own, and in fact, I did have to repaint it on my own, though I never did get around to finishing the trim in pure white like I planned. I wonder if the girl that took over my lease ever did…
Anywhoooooo.
I’ve been text-flirting with someone for a few weeks now. We’ve run into each other several times I’ve enjoyed hanging out and getting to know him without any pressures or expectations; which is really nice. He has fantastic taste in luxury goods and I suspect he’s a bit of a foodie, perhaps even more than I consider myself. There hasn’t been much actual conversation because that’s not how I roll. I talk. They listen. They talk. I get distracted by shiny objects and hear every fourth to sixth word and hope that I can follow the thought process without embarrassing myself. If a number or math scenario jumps up, forget it, I’m completely out of the conversation. Of course there are things about him that I’m concerned about… my dating life wouldn’t resemble a Seinfeld episode if there weren’t.
Yes, I’ve avoided people for petty things, Mr. Loud talker immediately comes to mind. But I’ve yet to see anything about him that is petty enough for me to throw in the towel on him. I’m taking a let’s make out and see approach to this.
Earlier I was talking to this one about him and while we were discussing everything he noticed my new beard (which looks like a dirty blonde/brown version of Dr. Quest’s beard) and I sent him the original of the above photo. He laughed.
I said “Dr. Quest… My Hot lover”
Laughter
“Dr. Quest…. Hot Lover!!”
A little while later, I received the above picture of my dream date with Race Bannon.
