beyond buffalo

Last month I turned 40 years old. Sometime in mid-July, I gathered together with my closest friends (that were able to travel) and celebrated a day that I never though would arrive. I’ve never been the type of person to celebrate my birthday, because, well, to be honest, I didn’t do anything. I just showed up. You could say it set the stage for my professional life but that is another story for another day.

In my entire life, I’ve had 5 birthday parties. My first party was when I was a year old and I have no recollection of it even occurring. I could be fabricating the very fact the party happened. My second party occurred when I was in the 8-13 range. (I’ve never really been good with time and dates.) My third party occurred when I was 29 and took place at a tiny little sushi joint in Noe Valley here in San Francisco. The eight people that attended took over the restaurant and it was one of, if not the best, sushi meals ever. New to that party was Birthday Rick, so called because he was my birthday present to myself. We met 3 days prior to the event and I invited him immediately. He must have enjoyed himself since he’s still part of my life. The following year, 30, saw a concerted effort by several friends and the BF du Jour to throw me a house-based birthday party that was well attended and a lot of fun.

That was it. Until this year when, over a big glass of wine, I was advised there would be a party to mark year 40. I was assured there would be nothing for me to do except show up. Ok, then, sure. Let’s do it and the invites went out far and wide to my core group of friend that have scattered to the corners of the country and world.

The event was planned and the venues shopped. Decided upon and revised and revised again. It grew to enormous proportions. We were talking 100 guests and thousands of dollars and I finally blew a gasket and said “No”.

I cancelled the party, and requested my deposit back from the restaurant. But… not the entire deposit. Nor was the party completely cancelled. I wanted to spend my 40th birthday with those that are most important to me and I did.

There were 14 people circling the table, the gifts all carried a duct tape theme and the homemade cake shaped like an iPhone complete with apps blew my mind. (Even more so when they circled it with 40 candles and set it alight). They turned down the lights in the restaurant but I swore they turned them on full.

All in all I enjoyed my 40th birthday immensely and I’m very glad that I was convinced to throw the party.